Wednesday, February 29, 2012

dEALING WITH BULLYING...

From the moment my little buddy joined me in this beautiful world
I knew from the bottom of my heart that it was a better world because he was here...with his sweet brown eyes, his smile that makes his mommy melt every time, his charming personality,his sense of humor, his sweet, caring, loyal and forgiving personality he has. 
But sometimes that sweet, genuine personality of his is
what little people can't appreciate.
the summer before he started kindergarten he had a really good friend they played non-stop every single day.
Kindergarten started and they were in the same class.
Because the Moms really wanted them to be together
(Definitely a Learning Experience, NOT TO DO THAT AGAIN).
Drake would come home crying telling me how his friend,
was been really mean to him, he would put him down, embarrassed him and try to compete with him at every little thing. it continued, so we spoke to his mom a few times. 
Drake continued wanting to keep been friends with this little boy and kept forgiving him... for every little thing he did to him. For a while he wouldn't tell us of the things that he was doing to him. :(
When me and my husband finally had it...
I mean we were pissed at this point, we decided to sit down with our little 5 year old boy and tell him what a BULLY was and what a TRUE FRIEND was, how some kids make other kids feel bad because they are not happy with themselves, how most times they have been bullied themselves and by them doing that to other kids they were protecting themselves by BULLYING OTHERS. How most times kids don't even know that their acting like BULLIES. But there is also times that some kids just like to BULLY others because they enjoy it... which is very sad

We've always taught both our kids that they need to 
speak their mind in a loving way
that they always have to stand up for what they believe 
is right and wrong 
that they should never let anyone ever put them down 
and make them feel like their less...
So that's what he did. He was the only one that could say 
I've had enough and you can't mess with me...
He was the only one that could stop it if the other kid 
continued treating him this way... 
we were so proud of him for believing in himself!!!

I think because he is so sweet sometimes he can't really tell when someone is being a jerk to him or maybe he just tries to ignore it and thinks that they will stop and be nice...
So a few weeks ago when one of his friends started acting like a BULLY to him. He was so upset. We sat down with him and we talked again... but in a much grown up way about the subject.
I believe that after the conversation we had last night,
he will remember who he is. Remember what mom and dad have taught him and that's what we as parents can do to teach them while they are young,
to say...

I WONT BE BULLIED
I WONT BE A BULLY
I WILL STAND UP FOR MYSELF...
I WILL FIGHT FOR WHAT'S RIGHT...

A few days ago one of my fave teachers at Drake's school posted this on her Facebook status.

The boy you punched in the hall today. Committed suicide a few minutes ago. 
That girl you called a slut in class today. She's a virgin. 
The boy you called lame. He has to work every night to support his family. ... 
That girl you pushed down the other day. She's already being abused at home. 
That girl you called fat. She's starving herself. 
The old man you made fun of cause of the ugly scars. He fought for our country. 
The boy you made fun of for crying. His mother is dying. 
You think you know them. Guess what? You don't! 

she wrote this at the end:(being a teacher I try my hardest to keep our students feeling safe but we also need to talk to our kids as parents. talking goes a long ways so please talk to your kids... make the difference :)

It got to me, because I was one of those kids 
that was mentioned...
I NEVER STOOD UP FOR MYSELF, THEN... 
I HONESTLY WISH I HAD!!!
I don't think people really realized how big of an issue it is. It's up to us to raise a good generation, to raise good leaders, to raise amazing peacemakers, to raise our kids the right way...
to show them LOVE, RESPECT and HONESTY but most importantly take your time to LISTEN TO THEM.


 
to learn more go to stopbullying.gov
XO